Tag Archive | kids

What’s it really like to home educate?

In case there’s a few parents out there wondering what it would be like to home educate instead of restarting school after half term, here’s a post from when ‘A Funny Kind of Education’ was published which will tell you!

It’s collected some super reviews on Amazon since then so if you’re one of the wonderful parents who left one a massive THANK YOU! If you haven’t and you’d like to I’d be eternally grateful, as I am to all my readers.

For those who haven’t read it yet, it’s basically the story of an ordinary family.

Make a good present for someone!

Make a good present for someone!

Yes – ordinary. Not extreme, or alternative, academic or religious because we’re not necessarily any of those things. We just felt that we could no longer watch our kids becoming unhappy, unwell, and switched off to the learning they’d always been so keen on before they went to school. So we decided to withdraw them from the system and do something else; home educate. And we built an extraordinary happiness doing it.

It wasn’t all roses – course not! No family life is. But it wasn’t as hard as you might think either. What it was – or turned out to be – was a continued joy and something we never regretted for one single instant.

If the idea of home schooling freaks you out this will help you realise it doesn’t need to. Because, if you think about it, you will have already been home educating your child. You just weren’t aware of it. But you will have been teaching your child no amount of stuff pre-school; how to walk and talk, use tools and the toilet! Get dressed and use technology. All sorts of things.

It’s just that this little family returned to that full time, educating through every day life, through all the little dramas all families go through, from indecision, bereavement and moving house, to what to cook for tea and how to think about the future. It all has the potential for learning – even going to the loo!

So, if you’ve ever wondered what a home school family life was like, this will give you a peep. A peep at the learning and laughter and love all rolled into one, that home educating turned out to be.

Read an exert or two on the MY BOOKS page.

And for more tips and insight into the home educating life see my newest book; ‘A Home Education Notebook to encourage and inspire’

Are you neglecting part of your child’s education?

We love our kids. We lavish care and attention on them, buy them treats, take them places, see to their education and welfare. That’s our responsibility as parents.

So if we’re taking that responsibility seriously, why then is obesity becoming an epidemic?

I know that’s a sensitive and contentious question. No one wants to point the blame at anyone. Parents have enough of that.

But I look at it this way; we would consider it total neglect if we did not educate our kids in the skills of reading and maths for example. Yet we don’t see it as neglect when we fail to educate them in the skills of maintaining a healthy weight, and teach them through our own demonstration.

I’m raising this issue after watching this shocking report on Inside Out East about Type 2 Diabetes and how, in many cases, it leads to surgery which could have been preventable. It’s here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b07zcmx3/inside-out-east-24102016

It’s a subject that has had much coverage around the news to raise awareness of this growing problem. (Read more here)

I also live in one of the poorer areas like those in the programme where there are almost more people who are obese than otherwise, and I can see the size of the problem, if you’ll forgive the pun.

When you are surrounded by people who are all similar to you, you begin to see this as the norm; it becomes a cultural norm, you begin to think it doesn’t matter as everyone seems to be overweight – it must be okay. And it’s all too easy to over indulge when fast food, buns, cakes, chips and chocolate leap out and tempt you at every turn. I should know; I have a dangerously sweet tooth that’s very difficult to manage!

But it does matter and when it comes to causing harm to our kids no one can take the responsibility other than ourselves as parents and mentors. I agree that companies cash in on our weaknesses. But they can only do that if we comply; the ultimate responsibility lies with us.

According to the report people are having amputations that could have been prevented by taking some of that responsibility. Is that what we’re leading our kids towards too?

What’s it worth to develop a lifestyle that avoids such dire consequences?

Kids do what we do. Whilst they’re kids we have an opportunity to lay down some fundamental habits that set them up for life. You cannot control them forever. But you can give them a good start – you have, in this case, to practice what you preach. Be what you want them to become – that’s the most influential way. Words don’t work as well as actions.

The habits you cultivate in your family now are the ones that will impact on your children the most, whilst they are children. After that it’s up to them.

But habits of lifestyle and habits of learning are equally important subjects of an education. And are surely all part of the duty we share to facilitate a future for our kids that is happy, healthy and wise.

Fab time!

I had a delightful time meeting parents at the Home Education Fair in London.
Thank you so much to all who came up to me to tell me how helpful the books have been. I’m overwhelmed by your kind compliments. 20161002_120726

Quite amazing to see the increase in interest in home education. Although when I hear accounts of some schools’ practices and approaches that shouldn’t be surprising. And not surprising to hear that parents want to encourage their children to learn in a different way from the hot housing and political wangling that the system has made of education.

It seems there are all sorts of reason parents turn to home education; some as a result of problems in school, some decide before the kids even get to school because they’re so disenchanted by the system. And it crosses all ages of children now from toddlers to teens. Some kids never go to school at all, some go for parts of it, some end up out of it at a later stage. It also crosses all the social, cultural, financial, educational climes as well. And it’s wonderful to see parents making a stand against the political manipulation of children as pawns to raise popularity with voters.

I always thought I was a cynic thinking this way about the education system. But as I’ve seen the joy of learning taken away from children, teachers and schools, I feel it even more strongly now.

Home educating (or home schooling as it’s sometimes referred too – see this post) puts the joy back into learning and education, as it should be. It also puts charge back in the hands of the parents which actually the law says is required of them.

Someone said to me recently; ‘Home education is a huge commitment on the part of the parent, isn’t it?’

I find this remark quite astonishing really. Having children is already a commitment isn’t it?

How committed are we? Educating children in whatever form is also already a commitment. It’s just there are increasing numbers of parents that are unwilling to hand that over to a governmental system that’s failing to front up to their commitment to children instead of their own political agenda!

I met some fab parents and some fab young people thriving and achieving through home education in a way I doubt they would through schooling.

Well done you all. Lovely to meet you!

Let’s meet at the Home Education Fair

I’m excited to be going to the Home Education Fair in London this year.

It’s on Sunday 2nd of October from 11am till 3pm, and offers an opportunity to meet home educating parents, get some information, listen to talks and even have tea and cake!

The full details are on their website here: https://sites.google.com/site/homeeducationfair/

If you’re in London and want to learn more about home education and meet some of the lovely people doing it, do come along. And come over and say hello to me on my book stall too! It’d be lovely to meet you.

London 2016 poster

Picture from edyourself.org

When your Home Ed child wants to try school

Some children thrive well in school. Schools are a valuable and necessary route for many families.

You may be surprised to hear me say that given that I’m all for home education and work to raise awareness of it and support parents wanting to home school their children.

But I’m not one of those home educators who’s dead against school whatever. It’s the systematic, conveyor-belt style of schooling offered to us as education, which attempts to make kids all the same and expects them all to perform all the same, that I’m against. And I personally abhor some of the methods used by generalised school approaches (like recent backwards move to grammar selection) to reach targets that seem nothing other than political. But that’s just a personal opinion.

The idea of schools as a place to go and learn in inspirational ways with inspirational guidance from enthusiastic others, alongside friends, is a good one. It’s just that this idea doesn’t manifest itself as reality in many cases, thanks to an obsession with measurement, testing, politics, ignorance and disregard for individual learning preferences.

Watching our children wilting in happiness, health, and motivation to learn anything at all when they’d been such inquisitive little beings before school, was what drove our decision to change.

But it was only ever our intention to home educate as long as they enjoyed it. And as they grew older there was always the choice for them to go back and learn as their friends did. Mostly they decided not to, but there was one point where we were thrown by our youngest’s announcement that she fancied trying it, even though she was the one who’d wilted most of all. You can read what happened in the book ‘A Funny Kind of Education’.

Like many home educating parents in this position we saw it as a failure on our part to fulfill her needs.

That was daft; it’s unlikely we could fill all their needs – just as schools cannot – there is no one experience that answers as education. And her curiosity about school (and that’s all it was) showed her intelligent and inquisitive mind which we had nurtured and developed as part of the educational process. And curiosity and a willingness to try things out is a good thing – even if it is school they want to try. We should rather be congratulating ourselves than bemoaning it.

If your child is going through a stage like this you have to keep an open mind of your own – hard though it may seem. And congratulate yourself on your intelligent child and their ability for curiosity and decision-making. The decision may well be reversed again – as ours did, as did other Home Ed children we knew who wanted to try school too. Many families use school for one and homeschool other children effectively But it’s important to respect their ideas, keep on talking about it with them, learn what you can about what they’re thinking, discuss their options, and hang in there!

For being rigidly against school can be as institutionalising an attitude as the one which school users sometimes display towards home educators when they’re having a go, isn’t it? The rather bigoted one we sometimes come across among those members of the public who don’t really understand home schooling or how successful it is.

All decision making as parents is hard. We need to share concerns, find support, and make sure we have a cross section of opinions, to guide us as parents. And meanwhile be brave enough, and open enough, to go with the flow of our children and respect that they will come to grow and know their own minds through experience. Whether that involves school or not.

And though thick and thin we must always stay on their side.

(Do dip into my books for more support and information)

Five common worries parents have before they home educate

Many parents tell me they’d like to home educate but don’t do so because of the same common concerns. Here’s five of them and how to view them differently:

1) I’m not clever enough to teach my children anything.

If you’re clever enough to raise your child past toddler stage, toileting stage, eating stage, speaking stage, you are clever enough to extend those skills you have to their further learning. Because that’s what they’ve been doing with you so far – learning. Everything you’d need to know and understand is online. Every fact your child would need to know is online. The support you need is also online and can lead you to groups and physical meet-ups. You don’t need to be clever. You need to be skilled; as in kind, encouraging, willing to learn and research and happy to give some time to your child. You are probably that already!

2) I worry my child will have no friends

All the home educated children I know and have met have friends. Schools DO NOT have the monopoly on friendships and are not always the healthiest place to forge them. Children make friends at school because they happen to be there. Children make friends wherever they happen to be; park, football, music groups, cubs, gaming, and similar activities and online. They also make friends among the home schooled community through regular meet-ups, family swaps and social events.

3) I’m afraid of leaving the mainstream and feeling isolated.

An important fact: just because you’re leaving mainstream schooling it doesn’t mean you’re leaving mainstream life! You do all the ‘normal mainstream’ things all parents do and integrate with other mainstream families whilst you’re doing it. Isolation comes through lack of communication and connection and is not to do with physical isolation which doesn’t happen anyway – you’re so busy connecting with others. Some of your connections may change – you’ll make new ones. But if the people you are with are making you feel isolated because of your choices or beliefs then I suggest you choose different friends!

4) I’m afraid my kids won’t learn anything

Look at your kids. They’ve learned loads already, without you, without school, without teachers, testing or targets. I bet they know how to game, use their technology better than you do. Kids learn anyway, wherever they are, all the time. give children experiences and they learn from them. They can’t help it. With your guidance and direction they’ll learn even more as you take them places, show them things, talk endlessly about what you’re doing, observe, bring awareness to the world around them – there’s so much to learn about they’d never have the chance for in school. They learn more through conversation than any other way. So chat about; where you’re going, what you’re buying, the route you’re taking, the advertising, produce, budget, work, climate, waste, traffic, whatever. Observing, questioning, discussing is an enormously valuable learning approach that can be formalised with research and study skill practice at a later date. Their brain is an amazing self-organising computer that stores it all away for future reference and extended understanding. Stimulate them and they’ll learn – it’s as simple as that.

5)I’m afraid of how it’ll turn out and the kids failing.

Another important fact: kids fail in school all the time. With home education you cannot fail because if anything isn’t working you can change it. You will learn from other families how to approach it. You will also learn that everyone approaches it differently and that’s okay for we are all different anyway, so we can adapt good ideas to suit our own individual kids and family circumstances. That’s the beauty of home educating. When the children start school we tend to look at it day to day. We don’t really look too far ahead to them being teens, or exams, for example. In fact this is unimaginable when they’re small. It’s best to adopt that view when you start home educating. Take one day at a time. Make it the best you can (and there’ll always be days that are not the best, but that happens in school too doesn’t it!) There’s no point in worrying too far ahead as children constantly change – as does the rate at which they change – but one thing is certain; they never stand still and they never fail to learn.

So relax. Keep in contact with others. Review. Adjust. Keep flexible. Progress with your child. Trust in yourself as an intelligent caring person. That’s all you need to be.

And enjoy it. that’s the best approach of all.

AHEN-THUMBNAIL-200

Buy it at a discount from birdsnestbooks.co.uk this month

(There’s a lot more about worries and wobbles in my new book ‘A Home Education Notebook’. Available through the publishers Bird’s Nest Books who are offering a discount on their home education titles this month).

Not Going Back To School

It a20160829_155706.jpglways seemed to be the perfect blue-sky-over-harvest days when we had to ‘Go Back’. The ‘Going Back’ feeling settled over us all like Sunday nights.

When I was a child it wasn’t only going back to school, it was also going back to the city where we felt equally imprisoned after our summer in the country.

But going back to school had as much as a sense of imprisonment of minds as physical confinement. And although progress has inevitably been made since I went to school, I sense the imprisoned minds of today’s children even worse than back then. Everything about learning has been so compartmentalised, measured, trussed up and forced into an ever tighter climate that the kids can be inhibited from learning at all. Certainly learning things that are useful to them for life outside of school!

I felt that sense of doom as strongly as a teacher as I did as a child. And not just for myself, but for all the children who had to be shut back in class when outdoors September would bloom like another summer. Have you noticed when the kids go back it’s always glorious weather?

Then, when our children did their short spell in school, I experienced it again. And wondered; do kids – physically, mentally and emotionally – really have to be so imprisoned for an education?

Home educating taught us that it didn’t.

And it taught our young people that, although there will be times that learning may be boring and needed sticking at to achieve certain goals, the bulk of it is inspirational, it is not imprisoning but liberating and exciting, and has a purpose and a practice that they can take on themselves, for themselves, simply because learning is a way to enhance a life. And no one has to suffer to do it.

Throughout our home educating days I felt blessed that their happy learning lives could continue on through September – and all year round really.

I do acknowledge that many children have happy learning lives in school which is brilliant. But I also know that many don’t; the nature of school does not suit them and they do not thrive and achieve well there. Some don’t even keep well.

Home educating offers a workable, successful and in many cases liberating alternative for those children and an opportunity to learn without school – there are many home educated adults out there now proving that it works.

For education should be liberating, certainly uplifting and inspiring, broadening lives and minds and enhancing them, not imprisoning them.

We found home educating the most liberating learning experience of all.

If you haven’t already; you should seriously consider it. (Browse round this site for stories and tips to help). And eradicate that Going Back feeling for good.

And if you’re already doing so, may you continue to enjoy the experience as much as we did.