Tag Archive | common homeschool worries

Clear out those Home Ed worries

I came across some of my old home education diaries and files the other day whilst having a clear out.

Goodness, didn’t I worry about everything and anything! And there’s nothing like a diary for an offload of all the concerns and glums that hound us day to day. I think I need to burn them because they’re not a true reflection of the pleasure and inspiration home educating gave us.

I kept worries mostly hidden in my public writings because I wanted to encourage and support and that might have given a rosy impression. But underneath I worried just as much as anyone.

Now I’m through it I thought I’d share some of them because I bet they’re familiar, and you’ll be able to see how they resolved.

I suppose the biggest over riding worry is; ‘am I doing the right thing?’

Ironic we rarely ask that question when we send the kids off to school!

The only thing you can do to combat this concern is trust your guts at the time. Review regularly. And rest assured that thousands of families and young people who have grown up and moved on from their home educating days are contributing to the growing body of proof that it is the right thing for many. And it does work.

After that I worried about whether the children would learn anything. But it didn’t take me long to notice them soaking up knowledge, skills and abilities much faster than when they’d been in the classroom where learning had been so restricted and inhibited. The internet has almost every learning resource you could possibly need, both for you and for them, along with group support. The kids can access this learning for themselves, and do so, without teachers or anyone giving them permission. Of course they’ll learn – just try and stop them!

I also worried about mixing and friends. But as soon as we began to forge relationships with the home school community I realised how unhealthy, restricted and unnatural were the relationships forged within a classroom. I also remembered how many times the kids came home from school upset by others – children and staff! As we were out and about experiencing normal social interaction, and as pre-home ed they continued with the same groups and clubs they’d always done, their friendships were just as broad as they’d ever been. In fact, they were more secure, built as they were on healthy respect and common interest, not age or desperation. The kids grew in confidence and social competence and seemed more socially advanced than many of their school peers; a comment often heard about home ed kids.

I’d forgotten this but it seems I also worried about their day to day progress. However, as I watched them learning all the time I saw that learning doesn’t progress in that steady upward gradient the professionals like to monitor, but in fits and starts, surges and plateaus, and that’s okay. They still end up in the same place as their contemporaries by the time they’re grown! And of course I worried about whether they’d be able to formalise this patchwork learning into standard courses or qualifications if they needed to at a later date. But they did so easily, finding that their ability to study without direction far exceeded the other students they met at college and Uni, to the point of them wondering why others went there since they didn’t seem to want to learn!

And embedded among all this was the nagging concern as to whether we’d still be friends at the end of it all and whether they’d still be speaking to me for subjecting them to such an unorthodox way of educating. And of course they are. (Odd that I didn’t ask if they’d hate me for sending them to school!) We are best friends and have as strong and as loving a relationship as we ever did.

So my advice to you is to put worrying on hold, enjoy your time with your young people for they won’t be with you forever, enjoy your learning experiences. And most of all; stay with the moment you’re in and make it the best it can be at the time. (And quit worrying about that too; it won’t be the best all the time – it isn’t in school either!)

Then all those enjoyed moments will piece together to make a happy home ed life whose influence will extend far beyond this time now.

Another kind of educational mainstream

It’s been enormously heart warming to recently receive a flurry of compliments about my book ‘A Home Education Notebook’, after it became a best seller in its section on Amazon. I am so uplifted and moved most particularly to know, through your kind comments, that the book is achieving what I intended in reassuring and supporting home educating parents everywhere.

A peep into the Home Ed Notebook

I always felt that while we parents are busy encouraging, facilitating and supporting the education of our children, we need exactly the same support to keep going with it. Moral support more than anything; to step off that mainline track, to stick to our convictions that school isn’t necessarily the best for our child, to withstand the doubts, fears and often unpleasant negativity coming from others, often even family, and hold true to our course.

No mean feat! That’s why I want to support you all – it’s truly an amazing and courageous thing you do.

But I also want to broadcast the fact that HOME EDUCATING WORKS.

As home education or home schooling becomes more well known (there’s an article about the difference here), and perhaps more understood as more and more home educating families are becoming visible, I sense that a new kind of profile and respect for it is growing. And maybe one day we’ll have a new kind of mainstream. Or is that wishful thinking? The Internet is certainly changing the face of education.

But whether that’s wishful thinking or not, there is now no denying that home educating works because of all the young people who are proving it. Young people are now graduating from their home school years, making their independent contribution to the wider mainstream world in a multitude of ways despite not being educated in a school. We have that generational proof now.

This blog and my books have been my contribution to changing that profile of it, along with supporting all those coming new to home educating. Around it you’ll find posts that deal with all the common concerns, like the socialisation issue for example, the family doubters, common worries etc. But I appreciate it’s time consuming to trawl through here which is why I placed them all in the notebook, making them easier to find.

And this post is not only to say a grateful thanks to all who’ve supported me, some over many years, and who’ve sent such lovely compliments and bought the book. But also to reiterate again: HOME EDUCATION WORKS. It’s doable, it DOES develop intelligent, social, educated, conscientious, hardworking and employable adults, and most of all is an enjoyable approach to those years that are often less so in school and the education of young people. Their broad, inclusive, independently thinking minds are making a wonderful contribution to society as they find their way in the adult world, providing the living proof.

So be reassured! And don’t let others’ fears and negativity dissuade you of that proof.

(The book is published by Bird’s Nest Books and available directly from them or from Amazon)